
Some things are happening in my life at the moment so hmmmmm please bear with me for a couple of minutes while I'm in my romantic mood (that doesn't happen very often but I quite like it actually :)
I was on my way home from Brett's when I saw half of a newspaper next to me on the tube..I hate when that happens because usually you only get half of one or another article and end up wanting to finish reading it but cannot. This time however I got a pull out section on Stephen King (valio valio valio!) and off I went catching up with his personal and professional life...It was prob the best interview with a living writer I have read in a long time and a very intimate interview as well..King talked about the theory or cliche or a hypothesis that "after every successful man there is a successful woman" and how this saying grew into an idea for a short story and later a novel that is coming out now as I write..So while asked to comment on the chosen theme, here's what King said...(refer to the paper cut out ;P I say amen to his words and could not agree more! Especially about the marriage part and being with that one person for a very long time)
It made me rethink some things..Go back to realities of my life and rethink the development of some events. I looked at people I have loved and saw how with some of them I knew I loved them and I KNEW I was loved and how with others I knew I was never loved but just really liked the idea of loving them instead (now, if you are asking yourself, how did I know they did not love me then read on and when you come to the last quote it should all make sense)..Anyway...I wont go into much detail here but what I wanted to say is that love in general is such an gigantic topic that I dare not tackle it and I trust the wisdom of others much better than my own imperfect judgment on matters of such magnitude and importance...So I thought (here it comes :)))..How do you know if someone loves you? How do you know if YOU love someone.(I know I know!! I feel like its not me talking as well! so pathetic but lets just finish it off)..Some people say it happens when "while being around that person you want to be a better version of yourself..."
which I think is soo so damn beautiful and true..And then..Other people say and I believe in that even stronger with every passing day:
"what you feel only matters to you, its what you DO to the people you love that counts..."
you know, I think I heard that in Last Kiss trailer! LOL Talk about cliches..But nonetheless...Who cares....The point is that I think its brilliant...That's exactly how I feel it and now Stephen King and some Wise Nobody has put it all down on paper for me..(Talk about prolonged realization. zirafos kaklas blem) That's when I got off the tube and it kind of clicked..Not a revelation as such but it just clicked..And it felt..Good..I could finally draw a line and know where I am standing..And more importantly - what I want...
such a fucking relief...its hard to explain and I dont really want to go that deep but yeah..it just...finally felt right
p.s. yes i CAN write better. yes i chose to write in such a shitty style and yes it disgusts me how first-grade it is but i just had to get it out there. do forgive haha.